.vresize.36.36.medium.0.png){kind=small}
.vresize.36.36.medium.0.png){kind=small}
Nebraska Football: A Husker Holiday Wish List for Santa
Bruce Thorson-USA TODAY Sports
It’s that time of year again! Well, Christmas trees have been available to pick up since before Halloween ended, but it’s officially time to deck the halls of the Nebraska football complex and write out your wishlists for Santa.
We here at Husker Corner make no exception and feel it’s our duty to make sure the jolly man up North knows that his girls and boys in Husker Nation could use some awesome gifts. Surely we’ll get what we ask for. Look at what color the guy wears, for crying out loud.
Year two of the Mike Riley Era was full of presents from a game that may have very well broken the spirit of the Oregon Ducks to one home game comeback after another. All of the nasty bounces of the ball that plagued 2015 seemed to be redeemed.
There’s a number of goodies that Santa could bring Mike Riley’s crew. Maybe a new set of gloves to make every day a WesterKatch® kind of day. How about a new set of cybernetic legs for Tommy Armstrong, Jr.? We have the technology and the cash. We can rebuild him.
Terrell Newby could certainly use one of those massage chairs to help heal his back after having to carry the team from time to time.
Ross Dzuris could use some MANLY mustache wax and the defensive backs could go for a new set of fanged mouth guards. What about the coaches? You know those electronic headsets have to fail eventually. It’s time to go to the next level! 21st-century technology, gentlemen!
Enough brainstorming. Let’s get down to business.
Jeff Hanisch-USA TODAY Sports
Tommy Armstrong’s Health
If there’s one person who deserves to feel as healthy as he did when fall camp started, it’s Tommy Armstrong.
It was known well before the season kicked off that despite not being selected as a captain, he was this team’s leader. He vocalized as much and did he ever deliver.
He threw for 2,180 yards and 14 touchdowns in addition to running for 512 yards and eight touchdowns.
For the holiday season, a full recovery for the bowl game seems in order for Armstrong to go out in style as he kept the Huskers afloat as much as he could this season, straining his body in the process.
It’s pretty impressive when a guy gets knocked out, carted off the field and comes back onto his team’s sideline in the amount of time he did when the Big Red visited Columbus to take on Ohio State.
Oh, and Santa, Armstrong also deserves at least one last quarterback scramble for a touchdown in the upcoming bowl game. Not just a ten-yarder, either. Something like a big 50-yarder where he breaks ankles and shames the defensive back seven.
I can see it now. Fourth and short at midfield. It’s the fourth quarter and the bowl game is tighter than anticipated. Mike Riley throws caution to the wind and puts all of the faith in the world in his quarterback. Armstrong takes the snap and Nick Gates and Jerald Foster clear the way. No. 4 sees daylight. The rest is history.
Bruce Thorson-USA TODAY Sports
What should Santa bring the guy with the stickiest mitts on the team and a family fan following that rivals the Nebraska football student section in size?
The “World’s Best Receiver” mug seems too obvious. Maybe some fancy coffees with “roasted secondary” labels? No. That’s too cheesy. A guaranteed draft pick to any NFL team but the Browns? Now we’re cooking with gas.
I know! Santa, if there’s any way you could find room in your sack for one last WesterKatch, it would give No. 1 the record for most catches in consecutive games! He’s currently tied with 36 and no doubt with his roommate (gotta get as much use out of that while I can) at the helm, Armstrong will be looking his way.
Also Santa, Jordan’s been very good during press conferences this year and he had some Conor McGregor swagger following a touchdown against Maryland. Perhaps if you could see your way to securing him some tickets to the next UFC bout that features the rough and tumble Irishman?
If there’s one thing the holidays doesn’t have enough of, it’s mixed martial arts.
Oh and I know that sometimes Armstrong’s passes that unfortunately go a bit over his head, so how about some extra long sticky hands just for the bowl game? Surely you can talk the refs into allowing it just this one time. You do have a naughty list, after all.
It would be a shame if they happened to get coal in their stockings.
Steven Branscombe-USA TODAY Sports
There are the players There are the coaches and there are all of the important people that go into making sure that the Nebraska football team performs at peak condition every week.
What about the guy that’s always there with a big ol’ smile regardless of the circumstance? When Nebraska was on the ropes against Ohio State and Iowa, did you see Herbie Husker frowning and fretting? No, sir.
A faithful, true blue (red?) member of the Scarlet and Cream Society, Herbie’s enthusiasm rivals Mike Riley’s himself!
What to ask for, though? What’s he going to do with another corn cob? A combine seems impractical. He’s probably gotten hit in the face by one too many footballs…
I’ve got it!
Santa, what Herbie needs is a day of rest and relaxation. A day where he can just be one of the guys. One of the weight-lifting, training table-mauling, film-addicted guys.
Get the FanSided App
Think of it. Spending some time in the player’s lounge while kicking up his feet and challenging the players he cheers for in a game of Madden. Time for a little friendly competition. A made-to-order lunch by the lovely members of the training table staff. Perhaps cap the evening off with some hot cocoa around the campfire at the top of North Stadium with the Huskers and…ugh…Lil Red.
Time for a little friendly competition. A made-to-order lunch by the lovely members of the training table staff. Perhaps cap the evening off with some hot cocoa around the campfire at the top of North Stadium with the Huskers and…ugh…Lil Red.
Despite my disdain for the little stress ball, I suppose that it’s the season of giving and he should be included in the fun. I’m not making any promises about hanging any sharp ornaments around him, though.
Jesse Johnson-USA TODAY Sports
It’s time that we addressed the Big Guy. The Big Guy in red. NO Santa, Mike Riley!
I know there are still skeptics out there, but that’s okay. Riley’s been a good boy this year which has to make his streak what? 63 in a row?
For a guy who is never mad, just disappointed, I feel that a bowl win is a good start. That makes perfect sense, but if you think about it, Riley would be sharing that present with the good people of Nebraska. Doesn’t that qualify him for even more?
First, I’d really like him to get a warm set of gloves. Every time I see him in a cold environment, he always has his hands in his pockets. Maybe it’s the coat. Heck, why not a new wardrobe? Heaven knows the people from Adidas can afford it.
Second, Riley being a head coach, sometimes he’s got to get tough with people. “Tough” being a relative term, that is. Maybe he has to pass along some bad news. Yeah, the guy delivering not-so-great announcements will help in any way possible, but you know what can cushion the blow? A little candy for the road. Riley always struck me as a taffy person. I recommend grape.
Finally Santa, some of the best coffee in the whole wide world should be delivered to North Stadium in Lincoln, Neb. It’s recruiting season, you know. Coffee is for closers as they say and Riley’s crew has to brew a fresh pot more than once or twice between now and February.
Bruce Thorson-USA TODAY Sports
Okay Santa, now understand I’m asking on behalf of Husker Nation here, so take that into account.
It’s been an up-and-down year. This team was held together with super glue and duct tape, but bung on to win every home game for the first time since 2012. Then there was the..ahem…unpleasantness. Regardless of whether or not Nebraska wins its bowl game, we’re looking at the big picture here.
What these fine people need is talent. I don’t mean regular, ho-hum, “Nebraska just happened to be the best option on the table” guys. I mean real, impactful players who can start as freshmen and make All-Big Ten teams.
I’m talking about the guys that are asked about on a daily basis. Darnay Holmes, Joseph Lewis, Deommodore Lenoir, Alaric Williams or maybe Nathan Tilford. Heck, why not both?
On Elijah Blades, on Jaylon Johnson, on Greg Johnson and on Jaylon Redd!
All of ‘em Santa! Christmas is the time for giving, you know!
The thing is, recruiting’s Christmas isn’t going to come until February. Maybe you could make an exception.
Make it a holidays and birthday gift kind of combo and leave the package behind with a “Do Not Open Until National Signing Day” sticker on the package.
The stargazing Nebraska football recruitniks deserve something extra special don’t they?
Want your voice heard? Join the Husker Corner team!
After all, they pour their hearts and souls into the hobby and you know they’ve got an ulcer or two because of it.
Be a pal, Santa. Please be a pal.
More from Husker Corner
This article originally appeared on 
