Asdrúbal Cabrera
Mets New Year's Resolutions
Asdrúbal Cabrera

Mets New Year's Resolutions

Updated Mar. 4, 2020 11:14 p.m. ET

It’s 2017, which means Spring Training is just six weeks away. And, of course, it means that it’s time for Mets New Year’s Resolutions!

In case you don’t already follow us on Twitter, in honor of the new year, we’ve been tweeting some Mets Resolutions for the past couple of days.

The Mets, with injuries crippling them, fell short of their goal in 2016, but they still made us all proud.

Now, it’s time to finally finish that unfinished business from 2015. Before that, though, it’s resolution time — for the players and other key figures!

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Matt Harvey: Don’t forget to pee.

David Wright: Don’t die.

Jacob deGrom: DeGromination.

Lucas Duda:  Try with all my heart to appease the fans who irrationally hate me.

Bartolo ColonFind a way to get traded back to the Mets in July.

Steven Matz: Stop missing starts.

Asdrubal Cabrera: Meet the original Assman, Cosmo Kramer.

Keith HernandezNone needed, never change. 

Yoenis Cespedes: Ride a horse to Citi Field.

Zack WheelerTo actually make it back to the mound this season.

Michael Conforto: Find that perfect set of bunk beds to sleep in with Thor.

Ray Ramirez: Stay away from the team.

    Jay Bruce: Don’t be on the team anymore.

    Noah Syndergaard: Learn to pitch left-handed since I’m already perfect from the right side.

    Travis d’ArnaudTry to suffer only one specific injury.

    Robert Gsellman: Stop being referred to as a deGrom clone.

    Curtis Granderson: Do even more good in the world until I win the Nobel Prize.

    Juan Lagares: Get back to Juanny Beisbol Gold Glove form.

    Brandon Nimmo: Score an endorsement deal with Colgate.

    Citi Field: Find an alternative to that awkward between-innings car race.

    Jose ReyesGo from being the spark of the team to a full blown firecracker.

    Terry CollinsMake better decisions.

    The fans: Stop doing the wave.

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