National Football League

For Darrel Young, a football life is all about giving back

Published Dec. 23, 2014 11:53 a.m. ET

Alex Marvez

Darrel Young's best game of the season came last Saturday when he scored two touchdowns to help lead Washington's 27-24 home upset of Philadelphia.

However, it wasn't the fullback's best moment at FedEx Field in 2014.

Young had quietly decided to become a Big Brother last May to a 12-year-old who needed support while trying to overcome a family tragedy and hardscrabble upbringing. Temporarily living in a shelter is just one of the difficulties Xavier McDonald and his clan have faced.

The family was in a completely different world when watching a preseason contest against Cleveland from a luxury suite three months after Young came into their lives. His courtesy was more than repaid when Young saw the look on the face of Xavier's mother Areya France after the game.

"She was just so thankful," Young told FOX Sports last week at his apartment near Redskins Park. "She hugged me and was like, 'Wow! I never thought we'd be in a situation like this.'

"I was like, 'God does things for a reason. I'm in a situation where I can help you right now. In 15 years I might need you to return the favor when I'm done playing.'"

Xavier McDonald hopes he has forged his own NFL career by that time. Of course, odds are that this bespectacled, precocious seventh-grader who has his own physical dimensions memorized down to a tee — "4-foot-8 3/4 and 75.8 pounds" — will be watching the Redskins from a distance rather than playing for his favorite team.

But that dream is secondary. Another far more important wish already was realized when Young entered his life.

"I remember my (middle school) counselor telling me they were giving me a mentor," Xavier said. "They said, 'He likes football. He is African-American. And he plays for the Redskins.' When I heard that part, I kind of jumped out of fear because players are all big.

"The day before I was going to see him I was losing my mind. My mom and my grandma were telling me just to chill out, that he was just a normal person and you shouldn't think of him as a celebrity. It worked."

The two usually meet up twice a week based upon Young's football schedule. They communicate via phone or text every day and will continue doing so once Young leaves town when the NFL season ends.

Through Young, Xavier has experienced things he wouldn't have otherwise. Besides that preseason trip to a Redskins game, Xavier was treated to floor seats for a recent NBA game where Washington Wizards forward Nene tumbled into his lap. He attended a car show. He ate at a fancy steakhouse and saw chefs put on a show preparing his meal at Benihana. Xavier even got to meet his idol: Redskins quarterback Robert Griffin III.

Darrel and Xavier took in a Washington Wizards game.

Those are some of the perks Young can provide, but they don't form the crux of their relationship.

"At first he was a little shy like, 'I can't believe this is a Redskins player,'" Young said. "So we went to Chipotle and I told him, 'Just tell me about you. Be open with me. I'm not a Redskins player anymore. I'm your big brother. Talk to me now. Tell me about school. What's going on?'

"He said, 'I'm angry all the time and I don't know why.' I said, 'That's why God sent me here.'"

Xavier's rage was being fueled by heartbreak from five years earlier and the financial struggles suffered by his family.

Areya and Kevin McDonald never married and had gone their separate ways after Xavier was born. As Xavier progressed through elementary school, Kevin wanted to become part of his life.

Areya was reluctant because she says Kevin had a troubled past, but eventually agreed to let the two begin speaking by phone. A bond was formed over an 18-month period. Xavier and Kevin finally were set to meet in person.

It never happened. Kevin McDonald died in a July 4, 2009 motorcycle accident just days before he was to meet his son. He was 28 years old.

"A whole year-and-a-half of working on a relationship was torn away," Areya said. "That where Xavier's heartache comes in."

Xavier's sullenness and mood swings weren't helped by an unstable living situation. Areya has admirably tried to provide for Xavier and his two younger siblings working as a hairdresser. While staying with her mother in Baltimore, Areya said she would drive more than an hour into Northern Virginia in a car with a cracked windshield that lacked air conditioning and heat in order to get Xavier better schooling.

When living on their own again, Areya said a dispute with her landlord about who would foot the bill for necessary repairs temporarily forced her family into a shelter. The experience left a mark on Xavier that touched the 27-year-old Young when the two first met.

"He said, 'I can't wait to help my mom,'" Young said. "I heard that and was like, 'You're 12, man. What are you talking about?' He just said, 'I'm tired of living in and out of shelters all the time. I hate rats. I hate not being able to wash my clothes when I want to.'

"This kid shouldn't be in this situation mentally. I'm going to try and make it better for him."

"Now, things have gotten better for them. But hearing that and how smart he was, I was like, 'This kid shouldn't be in this situation mentally. I'm going to try and make it better for him.'"

Helping others is nothing new for Young. He began getting involved in community service and charity appearances while playing at Villanova, but he has taken it to a much higher level with the Redskins.

Young initially didn't stick on Washington's roster as a rookie linebacker in 2009. After spending most of that season working at Foot Locker hoping for another NFL chance, Young re-signed with the Redskins in January 2010 and subsequently was converted to fullback by incoming head coach Mike Shanahan.

The transition worked. Young has become a key cog as both a blocker and short-yardage rusher. He tied the franchise's single-game record for touchdowns by scoring three last season in an overtime win over San Diego (the game ball is proudly on display in Young's dining room). He is a core special-teams player.

But to Allie Pisching, Young is even more valuable off the field. He has participated in a whopping 34 community events of all varieties in 2014.

"We put up a list each week of all the opportunities in the community outside the locker room and I think it's Darrel's personal mission to be the first one to sign up for every single event," said Pisching, who is the manager for the franchise's community and charitable programs. "I don't even think he reads what it is. He just wants to be there and give back."

And to think that in his early days with the franchise, Young was forced to wear a Redskins polo shirt to gatherings because he didn't have a customized jersey.

Young's reason for such heavy involvement and his encouragement of teammates to do the same is simple.

"I was always in the community but then I started to realize I was impacting some lives," Young said. "I then asked myself, 'Why aren't I doing this every week?' I always tell myself how bored I am here in Ashburn on my off-days. Why not just go out there and have some fun with the kids or military? Doing stuff like that has changed me."

Young has a particular interest in military-themed community service because his brother is a sergeant with more than 16 years of service in the Army. The fact that David Young Jr. and his family frequently move because of deployment led to Darrel inquiring about the Big Brothers/Big Sisters program.

"I have a niece and nephew and I'm not able to be around them too much," Darrel said. "I also know there are kids who are less fortunate with what they have. I thought, 'What am I doing that's so important that I can't impact a life?'"

Pisching contacted the local Big Brothers/Big Sisters chapter on Young's behalf last fall to begin the process. A lengthy vetting process followed that included a national background check, psychological evaluation, and personal and professional references.

After no red flags were found, Young was cleared and set to meet with a handful of potential candidates for mentoring. Young initially was looking for an older "little brother," but the bond with Xavier took hold immediately.

"We target kids who are facing adversity and struggling," said John Sanchez, the National Capital Area Big Brothers/Big Sisters executive director of program services. "Every child has potential. You just have to find the right mentor. With what we know about the child, we try to introduce the right person.

"We don't have many NFL players as Big Brothers because of their schedule and how busy they are. But we've been very impressed with what Darrel has done with Xavier. He has improved his grades in school and his self-confidence."

Young notices a difference in the way Xavier is "interacting with people. He's always been a nice kid but now he's more open with things."

Xavier is smiling a lot more, too.

"It's helped my anger management," he said.

The Redskins recently named Young their 2014 Walter Payton Man of the Year, given annually "to recognize a player's community service and volunteer efforts as well as his excellence on the field." Young now is eligible for the league-wide award presented in January at the Super Bowl.

Young makes it clear that his service isn't driven by trying to win this honor, but it was special to him for two reasons. The first is that the late Payton was his mother's favorite player. Darrel wore No. 34 as a high school running back in Amityville, NY, and she cried on the phone when he told her about the award.

The second relates to the negative impact that off-field incidents involving Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson have made on the image of NFL players.

"Obviously, there are a lot of things going on with domestic violence where two people have basically put a name on the NFL for it. It sucks," Young said. "But there are a lot of good guys out there who do good things. The J.J. Watts and Russell Wilsons who visit hospitals.

"That's what you want to be known for. You don't want to be known for a guy who's basically an a-hole."

Young was speaking while sprawled on a massage table having the kinks worked out of his body. He has experienced better days.

Young and the Redskins took a beating less than 24 hours earlier against the New York Giants, marking the team's sixth straight loss. Speculation abounds about whether Griffin and first-year head coach Jay Gruden will be back next season. Young will be peppered with questions about this during a paid weekly Monday night television appearance that requires him to use every ounce of knowledge about politically correct answers that he learned while completing a communications degree at Villanova.

But Young finds a way to make the best out of the situation. He decides to take Xavier along for the 45-minute ride to the television station. Xavier even gets to make an on-air cameo that the two laugh about.