A complete list of the Olympic sports in which LeBron James could medal
Like people making fun of synchronized swimming and complaining about tape delay, one thing you can rely on every four years is people trying to figure out how our top athletes in non-Olympic sports would fare in the lesser-known events of the Summer Games. This time, though, we got some keen insight into the hypothetical as American handball coach Javier Garcia-Cuesta was asked how long it would take LeBron James to become the best handball player in the world.
"Maybe six months. [...] He has everything. When you see him playing, your mouth drops."
Obviously it got me thinking about LeBron and the Olympics and handball and why its goalies exist if they never seem to block anything and whether Bob Marley is indeed bigger than Usain Bolt and what's the least embarrassing Marley song to like when you're in your mid-30s and then I realized I was getting off track, so decided to refocus and ask the simple question: If LeBron James had quit the NBA on Jan. 1, 2016 and decided to specifically learn and train for an individual sport, in which ones could he have won a medal at the Rio Olympics? Our complete list is below:
Beach volleyball: Obviously it'd take a crash course and work with a skilled coach every day to learn the ins, outs, strategies, positioning and form for each of these sports. But volleyball is pretty self explanatory and requires so many of the qualities used in basketball. What he'd lose in knowledge he'd make up for in brute strength, jumping ability and brute strength. But maybe he's not a beach guy.
Boxing: This is the one I pondered the most and it really depends on his ability to take a punch. However, the guys in the Olympics tend to be up-and-comers not battle-tested, veteran pros. The favorite to win the heavyweight gold is 25 years old. LeBron has the fitness, the footwork, the power and, most importantly, the reach. 'Bron has four inches on the bigger guys and despite what Rocky IV told us, that reach is a huge deal. But if you're into boxing, are good at boxing, completely disagree with me, think I'm an idiot and want to talk about it, my name is actually Nick Schwartz. (Wrestling doesn't make our list, by the way. Though LeBron could obviously have been a great wrestler, the technique is taught, then learned and with six months, I don't think there's enough time for the latter.)
Fencing: The surrounding idea here is that LeBron would dominate the athletic sports that have B-level athletes (and B-level might be kind) he'd be able to roll over. But with his size, agility and the fact that everything you read about these fencers suggests they aren't spend 12 hours a day at practice (this is what happens when you fence for an Ivy League school), I feel like a LeBron crash course could have him appeling, parrying, glissading, flecheing and balestring all over the piste in the flick of a foil.
Field hockey: The only thing that would prevent LeBron from becoming a great hockey player would be the ability to become such a proficient ice skater that it'd be as natural as running. That's not something that comes with a lot of practice packed into a few months, it comes with years of experience. Field hockey takes that ice skating thing right out of the equation.
Handball: Obviously. If Bill Belichick can let Nate Ebner out of training camp to play Olympic rugby, surely the Cavs can let LeBron go to Tokyo in 2020 to play a little handball. It'd be like Lolo Jones trying the bobsled, only interesting, feasible and entertaining.
Judo: It's easier to bring down some governments than it is to throw LeBron to the - mat? Is there no specific word for a judo mat? That seems like an oversight.
Rugby sevens: It's been exactly 8.5 months since Jan. 1, our theoretical LeBron start date. Given everything that makes LeBron LeBron, I'm pretty sure he could have learned enough by President's Day to dominate dudes from Fiji.
Volleyball: This would be the toughest, as LeBron would have to learn to play within the confines of the ultimate team sport. But if he can successfully star in a movie with Amy Schumer and Bill Hader, learning to push up a set shouldn't be too bad.
