National Football League

Mail-it-in Friday: How is your NFL Draft party shaping up?

Published Apr. 24, 2015 11:00 a.m. ET

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Sid Saraf

Can you feel it? It's in the air.

Remember, if you want your thoughts featured here, send us as a tweet using @FoxMailbag or just get at me @RealSidSaraf. OK, let's get to work!

DRAFT PLANS?

Sure, the draft isn't the Super Bowl. It probably won't draw in the non-football fan, but who cares about them? This is the Super Bowl of the offseason and more than a few people enjoy gathering in public or private to at least watch the first round. So, what are your plans for this year?

Zach,

WINGS! What kind of wings? Buffalo? BBQ? Honey Sriracha? Jamaican jerk? Spicy Asian? Curry Indian (doesn't exist)? I need some deets here, brother.

By the way, I need a ruling on chicken wings. A lot of restaurants list them in their appetizer sections, but then we have Buffalo Wild Wings (which I love) serving them as entrees. Can we get a consensus here? Are they snack food or not?

But getting back to Zach's point, they are the perfect thing to nosh on during a game. Especially at a bar. I even enjoy the celery and carrot sticks that come with it -- dipping them into the blue cheese gives me the illusion of eating healthy. However, have any of you noticed that you can't eat as many as you think?

I've seen Adam Richman power down 30 or 40 wings in 30 minutes, and it looks doable from my couch at home. However, when I have them in front of me, I'm throwing in the towel and asking for wet naps by around Wing 8. I totally can't hang.

Wise,

Sorry for your loss, New York. Hey, at least you always have those fond memories of crapping over whomever the Jets take. Don't worry, the NFL and Chicago won't last. Anyway, you're way better-looking than that tramp, honey.

Adam,

Hopefully, it goes better than the typical fantasy draft night.

You won't have that annoying moron who keeps bringing up random players and reminding the guy before you to snag that sleeper you had your eye on. There won't be anyone outside taking a smoke break and holding up the proceedings (OK, I'm guilty of that).

That guy who keeps trying to draft players already off the board? He has nothing to worry about. There won't be anyone trying to draft for someone who couldn't make it that day. There will be nobody on auto-draft who will complain that he got stuck with two kickers.

And furthermore, there won't be that guy who takes the draft way too seriously and takes a fifth quarterback just to force people to make trades with him. That guy can die in a fire.

K13,

Pizza and Skittles? Is that a British thing? If so, bravo!

That sounds like a good theme for a party. My wife is always looking for those. Who doesn't love pizza? And Skittles? Doesn't it makes sense to put those two together?

Vicki,

That's quite a long shot. What are the odds of that actually happening?

I will say though ... if I ever had a son (or daughter! equality!) taken in the NFL Draft, I'd be the happiest person in the room. This would be me:

And why? EARLY RETIREMENT FOR SID! That's right, I'd pull a total scumbag move and explain to my newly drafted offspring that all those days spent cleaning diapers and pretending to be interested in school plays must be repaid.

Time for a new house! New car! Per diem! Expense account!

My child will have to pull a Tyron Smith and cut off all contact with me. I'm a bad person.

Tim-may!!,

Didn't you ever see "The Lost Boys"? Once you invite a vampire into your home, you can't get rid of him!

Just kidding, I'm not a vampire ... or AM I? By the way, I'm calling it now: Drinking blood will become the next hipster fad.

After all, it's full of iron and nutrients! What's more organic than that?

HumbleSkins,

No doubt, dude. I'm glad you brought that up. Because our next topic just happens to be ...

POST-SCHEDULE HANGOVER

The 2015 NFL schedule was released on Tuesday, and of course, everyone was super excited about it. For some reason. I can't figure out why. Maybe all of you can. Why do we care about a listing of dates?

Todd,

Nick,

Looks like you ended up with a mixed bag. You got your Thanksgiving wish, but got negged for opening night.

Which is a good thing. Unless you're the defending champions, you want no part of that first Thursday game. It's not a good environment. You have to sit through a banner presentation and deal with a crowd that still hasn't sobered up since the Super Bowl.

Who needs that?

Nico,

Man, I'm jealous. Want to know what my vacation calendar is like during the fall and winter months? Blank. Nothing on it.

The NFL is my mistress starting in September, and she takes up all of my time. Oh, shut up. I can feel all of you playing tiny violins from here.

"Oh, poor baby. Get to watch NFL games and write silly blog posts about it for a living. Boo-frickety-hoo! Your whole life is a vacation!"

I'm not looking for sympathy or anything. I just would like to have Thanksgiving off occasionally. Do you know what it's like to not be drunk and arguing with my family by 2 p.m.? Torture! All is not lost, however. My wife and I have come up with a good system to save the holiday.

I wind up getting off work on Thanksgiving about 10 p.m. We just start our holiday at that time. Appetizers and drinks at 10:20 and we sit down for dinner around midnight. It's pretty fun.

Rational Sports,

No doubt. The NFL won't be happy until all 365 days on the calendar are dominated with football news.

It's just a matter of time until that happens. And here I am helping to make it so by talking about something as silly as the schedule ... in April. I'm part of the problem.

Duchess,

You better start saving as well. There are mortgages that come cheaper than some seats at Jerry World.

Pete,

As a Lakers fan, I strongly agree.

Erin,

That's the best reason I can come up with. Will the fall hurry up and get there already?

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