College Football

The Wing Bowl XXV, As Told Through Mesmerizing Photos

Updated Mar. 4, 2020 7:42 p.m. ET

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Fansided, Tim Ryan/FanSided via The Outside Game

Philadelphia’s annual display of gluttony, near-nudity — actually, in some cases nudity — and early morning inebriation celebrated its silver anniversary on Friday morning as Sports Radio WIP hosted its 25th annual Wing Bowl at the Wells Fargo Center.

A very packed Wells Fargo Center. At 6 am. With booze officially flowing at 7 am. Because Philly was made for this kinda shit. And god bless everyone who walked through that door like they had mistaken “Wing Bowl” for “Super Bowl.”

It certainly didn’t hurt that Ric Flair would be making an appearance, but I have full confidence the arena would’ve been filled to the gills had Snuffaluffagus been the featured celebrity guest.

No, not this Ric Flair.

Although major bonus points are in order for having a member of the original nWo, a fake Sting, and a member of the long defunct nWo Wolfpack in tow just in case things got dicey for Mini Nature Boy.

And no, not this Ric Flair either.

And definitely not this Jon Lovitz version of Ric Flair.

THIS RIC FLAIR.

The stylin’ and profilin’, limousine ridin’, jet plane flyin’, kiss-stealin’, wheelin’ n’ dealin’ son of a gun was in great spirits for the chicken wing contest, which should come as no surprise as its basically an eating competition disguised as a South Philly Mardi Gras.

The celebration of devouring wings saw local eater Notorious B.O.B. triumphantly take home the crown in the form of $10,000 and a 2017 Hyundai Sante Fe after downing 409 god damn buffalo wings.

Not too shabby, to be honest.

Five-time El Wingador made his return to the contest (following incarceration), losing in an exhibition against WB24 champ Molly Schuler.

Experiencing this event from the floor as the entrants made their way around “the rink” made it extra special, as it had a sprinkle of just about everything, including a bold Penguins fan generating some serious heat from the crowd.

As you can see from the older fella behind the glass and a few other ride or die Flyers fans, several emphatic middle fingers were delivered with great passion.

God bless you, Philly.

The presence of wrestling icon Ric Flair continually fired up an already lit audience throughout the morning while rapper Coolio belted out a few hits in a Ben Simmons jersey and promoted a post-event “Legs and Eggs” breakfast at a local strip joint.

Of course he did.

While feminists and animal rights group alike protest this spectacle each year, it simply needs to be experienced… mostly because some “fans” forget to eat breakfast.

And some “eaters” forget to wear shoes but make up for it with gorgeous body art.

After some back and forth with this professional EATER it was confirmed — allegedly — that this man is an estranged member of the Wyatt Family and also happens to be Big John Studd’s favorite nephew.

With such an unhinged crowd boozing at such an early hour, boobs inevitably made their way onto the Jumbotron, much to the delight of 20,000 roaring fans.

Of all the things witnessed, the presence of the Horse Head Gang might very well have been my favorite moment.

Just look at these guys.

via CSN Philly

As everyone knows, not all heroes wear capes. They wear horse heads and tank tops and they arrive in imposing packs like the boys from Sons of Anarchy. Beautiful stuff.

Guy in a Donald Trump mask with a microphone and choice seats? Check.

Some things simply never change, even at the reality-altering Wing Bowl.

So was there a sad clown and his beloved toilet being pulled around the perimeter of the rink, you ask?

You bet your sweet ass there was.

New hair trends were also started, as Philly is usually the go-to place where new fashion-forward ideas are birthed.

Speaking of fashion trends, uh, yeah…

And finally, before we get to the photo gallery, it’s worth noting that the winner was showered with confetti just they like they do at the Super Bowl.

At bottom right is most certainly not the winner, as this PROFESSIONAL EATER was in the midst of debating whether or not it’s a good idea to barf up 14 pounds of buffalo wings.

His orange thumb sums things up quite nicely.

All in all, Wing Bowl XXV was truly the day for special “artists” and early-rising booze hounds to shine like a blistering sun.

*****

For more scorching takes with extra sizzle and showmanship, follow Tim Ryan on Twitter and Instagram.

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